it's *JUST* a matter of time now!

i just had ics and she helped me mail my confirmation/application to the apartment in massachusetts. i hope this will get me outta here sooner. my immediate family (with exception to my brother, who is too busy WORKING and living his OWN life to cling to me or have any desire to mess up what's going on with my life because he's satisfied with his own life and isn't looking to make people miserable so he can cling to them- he's actually got BETTER things to do with his life) seem to have nothing better to do besides try to wreck what i've worked my whole life to get just because they don't have anything to be proud of themselves. i also had my ics help me schedule an appointment for therapy tomorrow. i hope that this prevents me from falling so much because i forgot to grab my cane before locking my door when i was heading to sabathani yesterday and i called my lyft ride, i had like 3 minutes til my lyft ride came when i finally realized i didn't have my cane. i would've had to unlock my door, walk into my apartment, get the cane, then lock the door again and i KNOW that would've taken longer than 3 minutes- and if i'd have just called a new lyft ride.. it'd take probably at least 45 minutes more to get a ride to sabathani. so i just went to sabathani, without my cane and i didn't fall until after my shift when i was in the bathroom and nobody seen me- so i got myself up right away without getting hurt. i also lost my balance when i got home after i got out of the lyft vehicle, when i was talking to two people and one of them helped me up. my health alert said they'd send me a new necklace like.. hm.. 2 or 3 weeks ago in "5 to 6 weeks". none of this matters considering what i got paid from the car accident! the driver and his family don't have to experience falling and people acting concerned- so it stops them from doing EVERYTHING.. DOESN'T MATTER AS LONG AS I GOT MONEY FROM THE ACCIDENT! *rolls eyes* there ARE more important things besides MONEY. I'M "UNGRATEFUL" THOUGH! WTF WOULD I KNOW?! more like insecure people accusing me of the very thing they are- JUST to feel better about themselves, so they don't have to face the damage they're REALLY responsible for. i hear a black woman saying in my head, "OH NO SHE DIN'T!" haha.. yes i did. you wanna try to indirectly harass me for being a VICTIM and almost dying for something your son almost killed me doing.. WHAT A CHRISTIAN THING TO DO! JESUS WOULD BE PROUD! but please- DO tell me how i need church to save me. when people do things like that- it just tells you exactly what they need themselves to feel better about themselves to distract from anything they've done wrong. so far.. all the family that i've heard from are a bunch of HYPOCRITES. they're just as bad as my own family. no wonder why tim and i seemed to connect so well. honestly. keep stalking me.. i'll move further away from your negative asses. massachusetts is about 200 some miles further away than new york FROM MINNESOTA.. i'll just go further. i've even looked into moving to mexico in case grump's fat ass forces me out of this country even though i'm a DUAL CITIZEN and i did get my citizenship of this country confirmed over a year or two ago- for the nosey jackass sisters trying to get me deported.